Post to be





I cry myself to sleep
ending up still awake until 6am.

Late as I go to my class, as everyday I do.
Can't recover from it.

No one ever notice what I feel inside.
I wear mascara in my eyes and lipstick on my mouth.

Now I realized I don't have real friends. Gossiping girls which I hate.

No one cares or dares to ask if I'm okay.
Even a family member won't do it.

The last time I checked I was enjoying the last bite of happiness from sharing what I have. which was the wrong move.

I do have breakdown moments. I just excuse myself and go inside a comfort room or lock myself in my room and cry all the way.

Its don't know who I can trust nowadays. even your closest confidant can leave you whenever.

The so-called friends have their problem on their own too and I don't want to be an additional drama in their lives. I let them love life.

I choose to let you go than to stay coz I know you'll not understand me.
I tried to reach out but you're not responding at a time when I needed you most.

No one ever had interest on me.
No one ever.

I'm always the second choice, second option, second best, second priority. The last thing you know.

I don't know what are my plans after the graduation and if I will pass this sem.
I have a lot of pending grades and I do messed up my college life.

I have a lot of patience but still I'm losing hope for my future.
I see darkness ahead.

I do have issues and struggles and at this point this is the only way I can express myself without telling anybody else but you. Just you, okay?

And must say I'm in a deep depression and I need help.... will you listen?

Zee

A young twenty year old girl who lives in the east urban area in the heart of the green city and still surviving the tough wonderful life. A proud filipina.